If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
