We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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