is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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