Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
our cab driver is having phone sex.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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