That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
