where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
