remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize