dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
