Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize