Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
this will be a night to untag.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀