He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize