This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
