this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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