I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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