awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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