this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
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