Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
