and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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