I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize