I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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