I am puke
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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