Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
