What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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