You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Randomize
