That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
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