recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Drake has all the answers
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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