i think my tv is drunk
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
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