i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
