WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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