She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize