first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
