what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Randomize