Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize
