i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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