We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize