Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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