omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
