we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
