listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
