I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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