i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
