There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
