went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize
