Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
