I have demons in me.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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