you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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