There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
there's paper in my vomit.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
