My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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