I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I think I won the penis lottery.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize