I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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